:)

Politics I supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

"It is better to look a fool and remain silent than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt."

There are two secrets to success in life:
1. Don't tell them everything you know.
2.

That was written on the top of the timesheet at the company I work for. There was an employee who didn't seem to get it, and wrote "Be happy" beside the 2. It's funny and sad at the same time.

"If one sees a giant, it is recommendable to examine the position of the sun first to see if it is not the shadow of the pigmy."

:)

Politicians, like diapers, need to be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

"It is better to look a fool and remain silent than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt."

Dang, no I can't use that one.

1. Life as we know it is a dirty trick.

2. Using the product voids the warranty.

3. Every time someone perfects a foolproof device, someone else perfects a better fool.

4. As soon as you tell someone the truth, somebody else changes what the truth is. Example:

A to B: "Your box is on the kitchen table."

C enters room: "Hey! Whose box was that which I just moved from the kitchen table to the closet."

5. Nothing will make a hidden defect in a digital product show up faster than releasing the product for sale will.

6. A CD player is just as useless without CDs as the CDs are useless without a CD player.

7. Once you standardize your music into one recording format, that format will be discontinued.

8. Actions speak louder, but politicians STILL won't shut up.

9. If you set n mousetraps, the (n+1)th mouse gets all of the cheese.

10. Nothing can make a job take longer than imposing a deadline does.

11. A late bus is no excuse to give to an early boss.

12. Never underestimate the power of stupidity.

13. You can tell when Democrats and Liberals have no valid argument in any debate. That's when they start using pejoratives, calling names, twisting the words of others, and all of the other Politically Incorrect things they continually scold others for doing.

:(

We cannot expect the Americans to jump from capitalism to communism. But we can assist their elected leaders in giving Americans small doses of socialism until they suddenly awake to find they have communism!

It is true that your teamwork is the best in every business. Share knowledge to your team so as you produce good result.

*Famous Quote of Casson to Hard Work
The men who succeed are the efficient few. They are the few who have the ambition and will power to develop themselves.

"Lying is the key to any good relationship"

"Give me a couple of years and a large research grant, and I'll give you a receipt."
--Richard Heathfield

Always bear in your mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other
--Abraham Lincoln

Never underestimate the power of stupidity.

Damn skippy

[QUOTE]If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything. [/QUOTE]

"Lying is the key to any good relationship"

these two followed each other. Irony?

May your coffin be made of 100 year old oak from a tree that I plant tomorrow

Anything not nailed down is mine. Anything I can pry loose is not nailed down.

A computer is like an Old Testament god, with a lot of rules and no mercy. - Joseph Campbell

A program is a device used to convert data into error messages.

A Windows user spends 1/3 of his life sleeping, 1/3 working, 1/3 waiting.

Hello, you've reached the psychiatric hotline. If you are obsessive/compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you have multiple personalities, press 2, 3, 4, and 5. If you are simply paranoid, just stay on the line - we know who you are.

Hello, you've reached me. If you don't know who me is, you've dialed the wrong number.

BTW, FWIW, IMHO, AFAIK, yes. OTOH, AAMOF, maybe not. YMMV.
(do i get points for only understanding by thhe way in my humble opinion?)

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach him to use the Net and he won't bother you for weeks.

The Web isn't better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble.

I don't question YOUR existence. - God

A dyslexic, agnostic insomniac - one who lies awake at night wondering if there really is a dog...

If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend the first four sharpening the axe."

- Abraham Lincoln

Would he even still have an axe by then end of that 4 hours?

Abraham Lincoln was special, you know. :)

Veni, vidi, voops! I came, I saw, I tripped.

--John of Darwin Awards