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Funny things to think about
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 391
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Posting Whiz
I was going through some of my old emails and came across this. I thought i'd share since there are some really good one here:
Things to think about
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for an eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Does the "Alphabet song" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
Things to think about
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for an eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Does the "Alphabet song" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
An eye for an eye and the world would be blind.
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 2,221
Reputation:
Solved Threads: 16
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Originally Posted by steven woodman 
I was going through some of my old emails and came across this. I thought i'd share since there are some really good one here:
Things to think about
Can you cry under water?
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How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
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Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for an eternity?
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Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
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What disease did cured ham actually have?
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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
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•
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•
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Does the "Alphabet song" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
Imagine a world without hypotheticals....
You can have my book when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers.
You can have my book when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers.
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 391
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Posting Whiz
LOL, good answers. I was wondering if anyone would actually answer these, and i kind of had a feeling grim would put his two cents in. Well i guess that means i owe you a penny......nah yours id worth two cents.
An eye for an eye and the world would be blind.
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 3,251
Reputation:
Solved Threads: 25
-6
#4 Oct 1st, 2008
A very interesting thread 
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 2,297
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Wow, Grim is pretty good at answering tough questions.
No one died when Clinton lied.
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Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 1,873
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I wasn't going to, but then I got bored so I did. These are the ones Grim got bored of answering.
...
>> Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
Babies can sleep anywhere; in cars, on people, during weddings, with no problem
>> If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Of course it is. What kind of stupid conjecture is that? It's a hearing of the state's case against a party.
>> Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Movies aren't physical. Televisions are. As to why that would lead to a difference in grammar... I don't know, but that's the only difference I could see.
>> Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Cause people have too much money. Also it's more efficient - you can see far more from a higher distance so you don't have to move as far.
>> Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Just cause they see you in the nip they don't have to see you bend over during the process.
>> Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
English is a weird language.
>> Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Ever make waffles in the toaster? I do. They need a couple of turns on the highest if you heat 'em from frozen.
>> If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
Don't know the song...
>> Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
Yes. It fulfills the obligations.
>> If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Haven't watched.
>> Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
Correction, they're both cartoon dogs.
>>If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
How else did they make so many episodes?
>> If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
Sigh.
>> If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Sigh.
>> Does the "Alphabet song" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune?
Yes. It's a common tune's song that's found in many other children's song.
>> Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
I didn't. It's common knowledge.
>> Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Sigh. If anyone in the world has an asteroid in their butt... God help them!
>> Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
My dog used to like both...
>> A very interesting thread
No... interesting would bring knowledge into someone's day, something you didn't know. Not silly 'penny for your thought' sentences.
...
>> Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
Babies can sleep anywhere; in cars, on people, during weddings, with no problem
>> If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Of course it is. What kind of stupid conjecture is that? It's a hearing of the state's case against a party.
>> Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Movies aren't physical. Televisions are. As to why that would lead to a difference in grammar... I don't know, but that's the only difference I could see.
>> Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Cause people have too much money. Also it's more efficient - you can see far more from a higher distance so you don't have to move as far.
>> Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Just cause they see you in the nip they don't have to see you bend over during the process.
>> Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
English is a weird language.
>> Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Ever make waffles in the toaster? I do. They need a couple of turns on the highest if you heat 'em from frozen.
>> If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
Don't know the song...
>> Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
Yes. It fulfills the obligations.
>> If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Haven't watched.
>> Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
Correction, they're both cartoon dogs.
>>If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
How else did they make so many episodes?
>> If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
Sigh.
>> If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Sigh.
>> Does the "Alphabet song" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune?
Yes. It's a common tune's song that's found in many other children's song.
>> Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
I didn't. It's common knowledge.
>> Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Sigh. If anyone in the world has an asteroid in their butt... God help them!
>> Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
My dog used to like both...
>> A very interesting thread
No... interesting would bring knowledge into someone's day, something you didn't know. Not silly 'penny for your thought' sentences.
Last edited by twomers; Oct 17th, 2008 at 5:54 pm.
you're so funny my future father... Ahihihihi
lol
lol (^.^) Art, Sci. & play had merged into the magical activity of programming (^.^)
-heroes of the c.r.
-heroes of the c.r.
Do you ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 a piece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards.
Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?
If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhoea... does that mean that one in five enjoys it?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?
If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhoea... does that mean that one in five enjoys it?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
(^.^) Art, Sci. & play had merged into the magical activity of programming (^.^)
-heroes of the c.r.
-heroes of the c.r.
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 1,495
Reputation: 
Solved Threads: 123
>Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?
Not really.
>Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?
Nope, croutons are not stale, they are just rebaked bread.
>If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
I doubt it
>If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
We are here to live, but life's more pleasant if people help eachother.
Not really.
>Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?
Nope, croutons are not stale, they are just rebaked bread.
>If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
I doubt it
>If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
We are here to live, but life's more pleasant if people help eachother.
I need pageviews! most fun profile ever :)
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