Translation:
I am a frigging sig spammer! Look at my signature!

Our cat had mittens after she swallowed a ball of yarn.

A Jewish mother would never say this:

"Be good and for your birthday I'll buy you a motorcycle!"

"I think a cluttered bedroom is a sign of creativity."

"Just leave all the lights on...it...

Q: "Did you hear about the JAP who had plastic surgery?"
A: "Her husband cut up her credit cards."

For the few who don't know, a JAP is a Jewish American Princess.

Looks like one of those women on Fox News.

Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging their right foot as they walk.

As they meet, one man looks at the other knowingly, points to his foot and says, "Vietnam,...

"Love flies, runs, and rejoices; it is free and nothing can hold it back."

Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully, we will wait."

Pastry Shoppe:
"Get your buns in here."

If you know of a good headline, post it here.

Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted

Some folks think wining is relaxing.

Very easy, if you have never been in jail, have an IQ of over 140, successfully helped as many folks as possible, accumulated lots of positive feedback and are a registered voter you too could become...

By learning you will understand opportunities.
By teaching you will be learning never to complain.

I like to see this one ---->

I have talked to a number of people who think that their 'democratic' country is really ruled by a secret group of influential folks who pull all the strings, and it wouldn't really matter what the...

Smart answer there moderator jbennet, but I am sure it's already been trademarked by Apple..

In a nut shell, an interestng character:
Ron Paul started his carreer as a U.S. Air Force flight surgeon.
He represented Texas in the U.S. House of Representatives for many years.
He is a...

The upcoming military budget for the US is $700,000,000,000. Many of the weapons we are buying don't have an enemy yet. IMHO, we could just throw a lot of that money out of a plane over a battle...

Not all Americans screw things up. It's only the 20% hardcore supporters of the present administration. These are the people that are in charge right now! The GIs in the field are trained to only...

In a rare moment of openness Jbennet posted this:
I thought it would be nice to give JB some expert recommendations.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment, for someday that person will not be there again.

Oh thanks, I was just thinking about turning the face red, maybe I better leave it that way.

The crowds, euphemisticly called "Bargain Hunters", are actually worse than the iPhone crowd, since...

Just a little dichotomy there, you call yourself "outdatedtech" and your title is "I'm new". Nice to see a new face! Lets hope you have a brain that is not as outdated as some of our more...

Just another one of those silly polls. This one asks you to list the country that most associates with the type of food (or drink) you like.

You might be able to hear, but can you listen?

You might be able to hear, but can you listen?

They say that married men lose the ability to hear the higher frequencies of the female voice. Apparently a survival mechanism.

Well, the world has gained another dictator! Actually, I think that General Musharraf isn't that bad of a leader. Pakistan might be just a country unfit for democracy.

What will prevent generals...

Good grief lasher511, I like your posts a lot better than the predictable poppycock posted by joshSCH. He seems to intimidate a lot of posters with his "terrible English" jerk stuff.

Those people who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
-- Isaac Asimov

So he listed "spots T-shirt"? I don't get it!

The other evening I was visiting my great grandpapa in the old folks home. The TV was running, and we both got captivated by a program on the History channel. It talked about the Mayan calendar and...

iamthwee, your legs must be four inches long. What an affliction! I feel sorry for you!

You know that our government's answer to any problem is to attach a label. Just look at your next bottle of beer, wine or stuffed pillow.

The latest news item is a complaint by the association...

You are waisting your time arguing against trailer-court conservatism. Looks like Mister Sinkular suffers from the incurable Limbaugh Rush disease!

I frankly don't know what that kind of low...

It takes many nails to make a crib, but just one screw to fill it!