Dim conn As New SqlConnection( connstring )
Dim cmd As New SqlCommand("SELECT Email, FullName, ReminderID FROM Reminders WHERE Active=1 AND EmailDate<=getdate()", conn)
Dim reader As SqlDataReader
Dim strIDs As String = ""
Dim strIDsFailed As String = ""
Dim mymail As MailMessage
 
Try
    conn.Open()
    reader = cmd.ExecuteReader()
 
    If reader.HasRows Then
        While reader.Read()
            Try
                mymail = New MailMessage()
                mymail.To = reader("Email")
                ...
                mymail.Body = bodyyoucreate & "Dear Mr./Ms. " & reader("FullName")        
                SMTPMail.smtpserver = ""
                SMTPMail.Send(mymail)                       
                strIDs &= "," & reader("ReminderID")
            Catch
                strIDsFailed &= "," & reader("ReminderID")
            End Try
        End While
    End If
 
    reader.Close()
 
'You should try looping through this again for all those who failed ("ids")
 
    If Len(strIDs) > 0 Then
        If strIDs.substring(0,1) = "," Then strIDs.Remove(0,1)
        cmd = New SqlCommand("UPDATE Reminders SET EmailDate=DATEADD(mm, 1, EmailDate) WHERE ReminderID IN (" & strIDs & ")", conn)
    End If
    conn.Close()
 
'might want to write to a text file all the id's that failed to be sent.
Catch
    'write to a text file about the date this failed.
End Try