PHP/AJAX/Javascript/Mysql - Master - NO FREELANCE (Los Angeles)


Here's the necessary skills. The more items from these lists that apply to you, the better.

1. Mastery of PHP in all contexts


- Web


- Dynamic pages, with and without AJAX capabilities
- Templatization
- Interface & management tool functionality design


- Command-line


- Tool design
- Maintenance scripts to support site functionality
- Multi-process
- Queue management
- Process communication
- Load balancing



2. Mastery of MySQL


- Relational design & structure


- Must be able to think of reality in terms of tables and keys.


- Optimization


- Must be able to analyze site and subsections to optimize keys and structures.




Here, in no particular order, is a secondary list of skills. Excessive abilities applicable to this list may make up for deficiencies in the skill list above. Any relevant knowledge and experience will be considered.

3. High-capacity storage.
4. High-traffic network situations.
5. Video processing & encoding.
6. Social networking.
7. User interface JavaScript/ActionScript (functionality, not design).
8. Memcached.
9. Advertising platforms.
10. Linux.
11. CSS.
12. RSS & other data feeds.
13. Affiliate Programs

Desirable personality traits and how they apply to our company work ethic:


- Proactive: Don't wait to be told to do what obviously needs to be done. Don't blame inaction on "waiting for information" that you could acquire yourself.
- Flexible: Specific hours in office are not enforced, with the following caveats: 1) put in your full-time hours and 2) be reachable when you're not here.
- Modest: Don't let your ego take control. Consider as valid the input and criticisms of your coworkers, most of whom will not be developers.



Some caricatures of possible employees:

[these need not apply]


- The Foot Dragger: (S)he resists change, despite logic, rationality & a unified company vision. (S)he will oppose all that breaks his or her illusion of an unchanging world and set routine.
- The Critic: (S)he contributes nothing but bitter criticisms about plans already decided and executed, instead of offering helpful advice beforehand.
- The Opportunist: (S)he does his/her share (or close to it), putting the marjority of their focus towards furthing their own goals at the expense of the company and its needs.
- The Minimalist: (S)he does the bare minimum to not get fired.
- The Social Butterfly: (S)he spends most of his/her time enjoying (read: abusing) the friendly, laid-back atmosphere here at the compound. This person not only doesn't complete their own work, but hinders others' completing theirs as well.



[we can work with these]


- The Perfectionist: (S)he sacrifices deadlines to the gods of complete perfection. We can help him or her decide on a functional "version 1's" that won't anger these deities.
- The Dreamer: (S)he sacrifices deadlines in the name of an endless dream of new features and functionality. We can help him or her determine reasonable goals and milestones that will honor that dream.
- The Skeptic: (S)he resists change, but will eventually submit to a good argument. Management here will prove itself as a good steward of his/her faith, inspiring confidence (and hopefully less and less skepticism!). This person is different from the Foot Dragger in that their objections are raised in good faith as genuine concerns about technological direction.



[we're seriously drooling over these folks]


- The Owner: (S)he will take ownership of technological concerns for a subsection of the entire company. This person will treat the responsibilities in their charge with the attention and care of a parent - defining and acquiring the resources for it to grow while not sacrificing its progress on the altar of ego.
- The Entrepeneur: (S)he will identify technologies in his/her purview that could be expanded to provide new streams of revenue and commercial interest to the company.



Please submit your application using the following parameters:
1. Acceptable attachment formats: PDF, Word, Text
2. Attachment naming: [Lastname]_[Firstname]-[Introduction|Personal_Statement|Resume].[extension]
3. Email body must contain:


- salary requirements
- availability times for interview & start dates
- your favorite color
- the name of the planet in our solar system (or any immediately adjacent) that best describes you