Anyway, to answer your 9 questions directly:
1.is it a software(I think it has to be)?
Generally yes. There are implementations of the core stack in firmware on some network boards (NICs).
2.Is it a BIOS level software?
No. The core protocols generally are kernel drivers.
3.Where is the protocol set installed in a computer?(Windows,linux,mac etc..)
Generally, the core protocols are kernel-level drivers for efficiency. Some protocols such as SSH, TELNET, and FTP are dynamically loaded when needed. There is a daemon on Linux/Unix systems called inetd (or xinetd - more current) which will start the SSH, TELNET, FTP, or other servers when a connection is made by the appropriate kind of client.
4.Can we uninstall it like normal software?
Not easily. Practically all networking today is built upon the TCP/IP protocol stack.
5.Can we update it?
Yes.
6.Where do routers and modems have that tcp/ip stack(protocol set)?
Incomplete question. Trying to read into your question, most routers run some sort of embedded Linux software, and the TCP/IP stack are kernel drivers. You can configure a kernel to build the protocols out of the kernel, but then you'd effectively have no networking at all.
7.In which language is it written?
Generally in C. Linux kernels are written almost entirely in C.
8.Will we ever get an update?
Often. When drivers are updated for Windows systems, or when the kernel is updated in Linux/Unix systems.
9.Did I bother you?
Not really. Just need to pay some bills tonight and finish installing software on my new company phone.
Just FYI, in our house we have at least 10 different operating systems running everything from this 8 core Linux workstation to phones running iOS, Android, and Symbian to two different routers, two generations of Mac Pro laptops (both x86 and PowerPC), Linux laptops and netbooks, 2 different QNX operating systems on older realtime development workstations, Linux on an embedded system development board, and a Windows 7 laptop. They are all running TCP/IP to network together. Oh, and I forgot to mention my Linux-powered Buffalo TeraStation network storage array! :-)
In our home:
Linux - 2 or 3 versions of Ubuntu, Scientific Linux, Debian (embedded systems development), uC (micro-controller) Linux (router and network storage array), DDWRT Linux (router), Android, Mepis, Gentoo
Windows - XP and Win7
Unix - Apple OSX (2 versions)
QNX - realtime development (2 versions active, and one old one mothballed)
I've probably forgotten a couple... :-) The point is that these are all very different systems, with different hardware, and each running a slightly different TCP/IP protocol stack, but they all inter-operate seamlessly. Why is that so? Because of the DDN Protocol Handbook and all those RFCs which specify to a fine detail how that stuff is supposed to work.