Video ram is Video ram, you cant expand Video mem into RAM as far as I know. OpenGL and DirectX (The most common card techs) 'almost' do this by using system ram if the vid mem runs out, the two areas are NEVER spanned into a single unit though. You could program this effect very easily, just detect if you run out of vid memory and then create whatever you wanted to create normally.
Vid mem is more desirable as the access is faster and it is on the same chip as the GPU so it makes more sense to use vid mem whenever possable. System RAM however i comparitivly slower for use in graphics operations as the data has to travel around the MB and back instead of 'next-door' to the vid mem zone. If you need more vid mem then you would require a GCard with a higher capacity