Why did the chicken cross the road?
>
>
> BARACK OBAMA:
>> The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a
> CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!
>
>
> JOHN McCAIN:
>> My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he
> recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue
> with all the chickens on the other side of the road.
>
>
> HILLARY CLINTON:
> When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little
> chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me
> uniquely qualified to ensure -- right from Day One! -- that
> every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to
> cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me....
>
>
> GEORGE W. BUSH:
> We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
> We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the
> road or not. The chicken is either against us or for us.
> There is no middle ground here.
>
>
> COLIN POWELL:
> Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the
> satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...
>
>
> JOHN KERRY:
> Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am
> now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was
> misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it
> now, and will remain against it.
>
>
> BILL CLINTON:
> I did not cross that road with THAT chicken!!!! .... What,
> exactly, is your definition of chicken?
>
>
> AL GORE:
> I invented the chicken!
>
>
> DICK CHENEY:
> Where's my gun?
>
>
> ANDERSON COOPER:
> We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have
> not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the
> road.
>
>
> PAT BUCHANAN:
> To steal the job of a decent, hard-working American.
>
>
> BARBARA WALTERS:
> Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be
> listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the
> heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of
> molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of
> crossing the road.
>
>
> OPRAH WINFREY:
> Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems,
> which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead
> of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take
> falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this
> chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and
> not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
>
>
> DR. PHIL:
> The problem we have here is that this chicken won't
> realize that he must first deal with the problem on
> 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the
> problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we
> need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by
> not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding
> 'NEW' problems.
>
>
> MARTHA STEWART:
> No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was
> going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to
> sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No
> little bird gave me any insider information.
>
>
> NANCY GRACE:
> That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You
> can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.
>
>
> BILL GATES:
> I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only
> cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important
> documents, and balance your check book. Internet Explorer is
> an integral pa rt of eChicken. This new platform is much
> more stable and will never crash.
>
>
> GRANDPA:
> In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the
> road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and
> that was good enough.
>
>
> DR. SEUSS:
> Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a
> toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed
> I've not been told.
>
>
> ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
> To die in the rain. Alone.
>
>
> ARISTOTLE:
> It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
>
>
> JOHN LENNON:
> Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
> together, in peace.
>
>
> ALBERT EINSTEIN:
> Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move
> beneath the chicken?
>
>
> COLONEL SANDERS:
> Did I miss one?