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Here are a series of messages I've been getting, it's partly my fault, but everytime I get a message via PM, it comes to my email.

I don't know if I'm allowed to complain here so here are the messages, and am I allowed to file a complaint?

Here's the whole incidence, the moderator quoted my own messages to which she responded so this is the incidence as up to now.

First messege (Responding to me flagging her):

Reported Post:

Don't bump year old threads, it's rude.

>Narue, you're code is full of bugs.
...

Words fail me. Don't *EVER* say this unless you can prove it. If you can't, you've stumbled upon the worst possible insult to a programmer.

>Lol, I tried running it and it displayed a lot of funny stuff.
Just because you run it and it doesn't work doesn't mean the code is buggy. It's more likely that you simply don't know what you're doing, and this "bug report" proves it. Don't ever comment on my code again.

in Sorting a 2d array of strings in C++??

Reason:
I may have insulted her without knowing it, but I could have given the error report if I had the chance. This post right before closing the thread was just rude.

Assigned Moderators: (moderators who were notified by e-mail)
big_k105, BountyX, Dave Sinkula, Narue, Paladine, Stack Overflow, vegaseat

You wouldn't have gotten the chance in that thread whether I had posted or not. Bumped threads are locked, without fail, and without question.

By the way, reporting me to whine instead of contacting me privately with your complaint and offering your "error report" is incredibly childish.

Second message:

And who are you to state what is childish and what isn't? New account, don't know you, registration rules says flag posts you think may be offensive...

You tell me what I'm supposed to think when I get such a response from someone who's a moderator with not only a sharp but attacking tone.

If you say something that can easily be viewed as offensive, you should expect it to be taken that way. Your wording was attrocious and the smiley at the end was in very poor taste. I don't care how new you are; common sense has no prerequisite.

In either case, I was working on this same problem, and apparently the thread was old, I didn't check the year date when I did a search for it, rather than choosing to start a new thread

That's fine. It happens, and we're understanding about it when it's obviously an innocent mistake. That doesn't mean I won't inform you that bumping an ancient thread is rude.

having no background in not only programming or the culture, I checked the thread hoping to find a hint, I took your code, entered it in... the program not only started beeping but kept having errors within it.

So, having no background in programming, you felt qualified to examine the code and determine that it was full of bugs? Perhaps I reacted too strongly, but you need to learn to assume that problems are your fault.

Too many programmers have a problem and blame anything but themselves: my compiler is buggy, the code I didn't write is flawed, the file format is wrong, my OS sucks. We hear it so often, and so often the problem was actually a mistake on their part, not any of the things they tried to use as a scapegoat.

I'm not being condescending either, all good programmers to this. Blame yourself first. If the real problem is someone else's fault, inform them in a way that you'd like to be informed. Tell me, how would you feel if I took some code you posted a year ago (most of which wasn't written by you) that you tested and posted with confidence and said:

Hey Free Arsenal, your code is full of bugs. :cool:

You're dealing with someone here who doesn't know these things, hasn't been on the forums for more than 24 hours, and then come in on me in such a way, I got to tell you, I'm sorry.

Everyone learns these things eventually. But now you know, and I doubt you'll forget. Perhaps you should simply accept it as a learning experience and get on with your life instead of getting insulted and running away.

I hope you don't have any hard feelings, in either case, I probably won't be on daniweb anymore, not just because I can't find information, but apparently also because it's obviously not a place for people without programming expeirence, or knowledge of programming culture for that matter.

I don't hold a grudge, but you'll have bad experiences no matter where you go. Well, except for the forums that force people to be nice, but you won't find any qualified helpers at those forums.

Daniweb welcomes beginners, and we're more than willing to help, but don't expect to be treated with kid gloves just because you lack experience. This is the same on any forum that's worth your time. But some people just don't get it until they've had a few helpings of reality on multiple forums.

So you tell me, someone responds to me in that way and tone, and I read the forum rules and regulations before coming onto this forum, do you think I'm going to send you a message when I'm given such a sharp and derailing tone?

Well, yes. If I were you, I would assume that there was a misunderstanding and seek to resolve it. But you would rather report me, make no attempt to figure out why I reacted like I did, and quit the forum. I guess this is where we differ, and that's probably why I'm a moderator with thousands of helpful posts and you're running away.

Bye.

Bye.

Third message:

... where we differ, and that's probably why I'm a moderator with thousands of helpful posts and you're running away.

This is a statement of your attitude

It's a statement of fact.

you assume that your posts are helpful

I would only be assuming if I didn't know what other people thought. I know my posts are helpful because I've been told so by the countless people who have found them helpful. In this case, it's you who's making the assumption.

and you assume that I'm just simply running away.

It looks that way on my end. You have a little difficulty in your first posts, then threaten to stop coming to the forum because of it.

If I were simply running away, tell me why I've taken the time to respond to this.

I don't know, you want to make a parting shot? You care what I think so you want to smooth things over before leaving? That doesn't change the fact that you're running away from Daniweb because you got flamed a bit. Or are you mistakenly assuming that I'll hold a grudge and repeatedly flame you?

I'm still sensing that concept of "you're better than me" in every word you type.

I am better than you. I'm not going to think of you as an equal or a better until you prove that you are. Arrogance comes with the territory, and unlike most others, I don't work as hard to hide it.

If it bothers you, tough. I really don't care since I'm unlikely to see you again.

Fourth Message:

>Well, at least you provided me with your true colors.
I'm arrogant, as most programmers are. I don't sugar coat anything. I'm nice when people deserve it and not so nice when they don't.

Analyzing my personality for "true colors" isn't exactly rocket science. :rolleyes: But if you feel you've stumbled upon a profound secret, more power to you.

But since you're leaving (why do you keep logging in to take pot shots at me?), it doesn't really matter. You can take your superior personality elsewhere and leave me be. Rest assured that your absence will make about as much difference to us as your presence. That is to say, zero.

p.s. Once or twice a year, someone like you shows up. They decide I'm not nice enough and proceed to preach to me. Then they leave, never to return. You're nothing more than an amusing diversion, offering no value at all to the community.

How does it feel to be a worthless troll?

I admit I played a part in angering her, but insults and personal attacks I feel are not necessary.

Is there anything that can be done, or can I just have my account deleted on this site in some way? I can't find a way to deactivate the email function.

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Last Post by >shadow<
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I would personally say that it has nothing to do with being a Moderator. You insulted a programmer (intentionally or not, isn't particularly relevent.... if it wasn't intentional, you probably should have apologized). The only thing she did as a moderator, was lock the bumped post, which hardly constitutes an abuse of moderator power. Had she edited your post, or deleted it, well, ok, but she didn't. This is a person to person battle, and her status as a moderator has nothing to do with it.

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As a result of this and other incidences, Narue has decided to step down as moderator :( Despite her "tell it like it is" attitude, she is very knowledgeable and has been a great asset to our community. With that said, I don't want this to go any further.

The lilac color scheme is not my fault. Quote boxes originally were in pale yellow and then pale grey but I received complaints that they were hard to see (especially on some laptops). I didn't want to introduce a new color (aside from a variant of yellow, grey, or purple) into the design and so light purple was the only one left. If you ask me, it reminds me of php.net

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As a result of this and other incidences, Narue has decided to step down as moderator :( Despite her "tell it like it is" attitude, she is very knowledgeable and has been a great asset to our community. With that said, I don't want this to go any further.

Oh come on. Now who is being childish? In my opinion she is the most knowledgable person in this forum, and it is mostly because of her that reading the answers in the C/C++ forum is worthwhile.
After all she should know that responses like this is part of parcel with speaking what she thinks is write.. If she has confidence on what she did was right why should she step down? She is the only moderator in the C/C++ forum that takes time to give answers at present. Dave was here when I joined the forum but recently I have seen no sign of him. If Narue also goes what will happen?

Regarding this incident, she is not abusing her power as a moderator when closing an old thread. But I see a very serious flaw in this banning system. How on earth does a message regarding a ban directed at one of the moderators goes to himself/herself? Bans should be confidential. We don't know who adds reputation to us. So why can't you do the same for the reverse? In my opinion it should be the most confidential. You should redesign this notification system Dani. Let the other moderators handle flags regarding a fellow moderator. I think that it was this notification system that started this in the first place.

And after all, if the person on the receiving end has already decided to go, why should be bother about him? Losing Narue will make this forum lose 10000 more persons like him. I am not saying that people like them are not worth staying, but if he has already gone, there is nothing we can do about that. If he stayed he could have benefited from Narue's knowledge. If he decided to leave..too bad.

Summary.
1. NARUE MUST STAY
2. Redesign the flag notification system
3. I think there is one more point that I have made in my post, but I can't figure what it is.

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I'm very confused by what you're trying to say. I fail to see the flaw in the flag notification system. However, it comes down to this:

Free Arsenal privately apologized after posting this thread saying that he knows he acted in the wrong and does not want to be the cause of Narue stepping down.
I don't want Narue to step down either. As I mentioned earlier in this thread, I recognize her as a valuable asset to our community. I will be the first to admit she'll be missed. It was, however, her decision.
No one is being banned.

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What I am trying to say is FreeArsenel flagged a post from Narue. How come a bad flag notification went to her? If she didn't get that notification the other moderators would have looked into the matter and made a decision. Because of the notification, she knew who sent it, why it was sent...and therefore started this private war between the two. As an example, in this case because Narue is in the receiving end, I think the notification should have gone only to big_k105, BountyX, Dave Sinkula, Paladine, Stack Overflow, vegaseat Other than that red dot in the control panel of the message, nobody else should know about the details.

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Narue is an equal staff member on DaniWeb. The way that the flag bad post system currently works is that when a post is flagged, a ticket regarding the issue is created in a private area visible only to staff. This allows for such threads to be handled most efficiently since any staff member can deal with the thread and mark it solved. Staff should, in theory, handle moderation issues impartially. We are, however, all human.

This is different than the reputation system! I agree, that no member or moderator should see who reputation came from.

When one clicks on Flag Bad Post, on the other hand, there is a message indicating that: This is ONLY to be used to report spam, advertising messages, and problematic (harassment, fighting, or rude) posts. Clearly, you can see how it would be valuable for threads fitting this description to be brought to the attention of all staff so that they are handled as quickly as possible by whomever happens to be online at the time.

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Narue is an equal staff member on DaniWeb. The way that the flag bad post system currently works is that when a post is flagged, a ticket regarding the issue is created in a private area visible only to staff. This allows for such threads to be handled most efficiently since any staff member can deal with the thread and mark it solved. Staff should, in theory, handle moderation issues impartially. We are, however, all human.

Ethically no moderator should be allowed to make decisions on their own post when there is a conflict regarding it. /*edit. bad example*/When it is a moderator's post that is being flagged dont send the notification to him/her.

This is different than the reputation system! I agree, that no member or moderator should see who reputation came from.

The reason I think is that people tend to favour people who voted for them. Well the way I see it, making friends is better than fighting.

When one clicks on Flag Bad Post, on the other hand, there is a message indicating that: This is ONLY to be used to report spam, advertising messages, and problematic (harassment, fighting, or rude) posts. Clearly, you can see how it would be valuable for threads fitting this description to be brought to the attention of all staff so that they are handled as quickly as possible by whomever happens to be online at the time.

I see the point. But in cases like this it brings a lot more conflict than keeping the thread in place for a few more days. It could be easily adjusted if you can put in the condition I suggested. Thanks.

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Regarding this incident, she is not abusing her power as a moderator when closing an old thread. But I see a very serious flaw in this banning system. How on earth does a message regarding a ban directed at one of the moderators goes to himself/herself? Bans should be confidential.

um I went through my own post just now. All these places where I have written ban... actually I meant flagging bad post. Sorry for any misunderstanding. I guess I was a bit ruffled。

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The following is part of a PM conversation I had with Narue:

It isn't just these two occurrances, I've been toying with leaving for a while and this is only the latest of encouragements. Stepping down is simply a way to encourage me not to feel obligated to hang around. ;) Here's the full story on my end:

1) Some very good things are happening in my life right now, but they promise to take up far too much of my time for me to be of any real use here.

2) It's obvious that my attitude isn't appreciated even if my knowledge is. First impressions are the most important, and since I'm not likely to change my ways (I have tried several times), it's better to simply remove the problem area than to let it eat away at the community.

3) All too often, my actions are viewed as those of a moderator, not as just another poster. As you said, I represent Daniweb, and even if my method is effective for teaching, I end up giving the community as a whole a bad reputation.

4) If nothing else, a long hiatus will be good for me. :) So good that I might not come back, which is why I said my absence would be semi-permanent.

p.s. You're welcome to quote this publicly to set the record straight with everyone. It seems like public opinion is that this incident was the cause and/or I was banned. ;)

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I was flamed by Narue within my first few posts, but I still think she will be a sad loss to the community, she made some of the topics worth reading!

I always thought flame wars were part and parcel of forum communities dating back to when usenet was a new thing.

It would be dreadfully dull and boring without some good old fashioned personal mud slinging. I love it me !

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I have been gone a few days and just read this thread this morning. I don't hang out in that particular forum where this all started, so at first I was just going to keep my thoughts to myself. But after reading Dani's post where she quoted Narue on her reasons for leaving, I wanted to anyway.....Personally, I never had any interaction with Narue. I did read some of her posts over the time that I have been a member here. I think a lot of it has to do with Narue's personal style....me being the type of person I am, there have been posts of her's where initially I would have been bothered, but that is just because I am on the opposite end of the spectrum than she is as far as personality goes. But I think what we need to remember is that this is a forum with LOTS of different personalities....and they all add a little something to the board. It's like a previous poster said....it keeps things interesting. It is a shame to lose such a great member, but going by what she said, she has some good things going for her at the moment, and I think we should all be happy for her and only wish her the best. :)

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Right, if she's stepping down because she has other things going on, then what she's doing is responsible. My initial thought was that she was leaving because she didn't want to give the site a bad rap (which she states). If that was her sole reason, then that's not cool.... but knowing she won't have time for us ( :cry: ) changes things.

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Being an experienced C/C++ programmer, I can say that Narue is a true expert. I don't care about the above...if this is a technical community she must stay (unless her life doesn't allow it). She would be more than a great loss...

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