Four men were sitting around a conference room table being interviewed for a job.
The interviewer asked, 'What is the fastest thing you know of?'
The first man replied, 'A thought.' It pops into your head, there's no forewarning that it's on the way; it's just there. A thought is the fastest thing I know of..'
'That's very good,' replied the interviewer.
'And now you, sir,' he asked the second man.
'Hmmm, let me see...... A blink!,' said the second man. 'It comes and goes and you don't know it ever happened. A blink is the fastest thing I know of.'
'Excellent!', said the interviewer. The blink of an eye. That's a very popular cliche for speed.'
The interviewer then turned to the third man who was contemplating his reply.
'Well,' said the third candidate, 'out on my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there is a light switch. When you flip that switch, way across the pasture the light at the barn comes on in an instant. Turning on a light is the fastest thing I can think of.'
The interviewer was very impressed with the third candidate's' answer and thought he had found his man.
'It's hard to beat the speed of light.', the Interviewer said.
Turning to the fourth man, he posed the same question.
'After hearing the three previous answers, it's obvious to me the fastest thing known is diarrhea,' said the fouth man.
'What!' said the interviewer, stunned by the response.
'Oh, I can explain,' said the fourth man. You see, the previous day I wasn't feeling too well and ran to the bathroom. But, before I could think, blink, or turn on the light, there was shit my pants.'
The fourth man got the job.