Just an accumulation of worldly wisdom in question answer format.

Q: "How Do You Get Holy Water?"
A: "You Boil The Hell Out Of It."

Q: "What Is The Difference Between A Harley And A Hoover?"
A: "The Location Of The Dirt Bag."

Q: How many NRA spokesmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: More guns.

Q: What do you call a dog which has no legs?
A: Anything you want; he's still not coming to you.

commented: Lmao!! +0

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs?
A: Ground beef

My dog has no nose.

How does he smell?

Of badger blood.

Shit sorry that wasn't quite in Q A format!

Q. (Cute girl you're hitting on asks) Are you gay, you seem gay?
A. Hell no! But my boyfriend definitely is.

Q: "What to you call gin and water?"
A: "Hydrogin."

commented: lols +0

Q: What's a Doctor?"
A: "A person who cures your ills, and then kills you with bills."

Q: "What's a Boss?"
A: "Someone who is early when you are late, and late when you are early."

Q: What is the thinnest book in the world?
A: "What Men Know About Women."

Q. What is the second thinnest book in the world?
A. When men are right, written by Women.

^^I just made that one up.

Q: "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
A (Dick Cheney): "Where's my gun?"

Q: "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
A (Pat Buchanan): "To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American."

Q: "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
A (Bill Gates): "I have just released eChicken2015, which will not only
cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance
your check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This
new platform is much more stable and will never crash.

Q: "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
A (John McCain): "My friends, that chicken crossed the road because it was what the majority of the American people wanted!"

Q: "What do you call ten rabbits marching backwards?"
A: "A receding hareline."

Q: "Why did the bunny cross the road?"
A: "It was the chicken's day off."

Q: "If a selfdriven car kills somebody on the road, who goes to jail? The passenger, the manufacturer, the programmer of the software?"
A: ????