We need to laugh... - Page 4

[jamello]

I've had this for a long while and I don't know if some of you guys had heard it. Here goes..

This happened in a german concentration camp during the xmas period. German battle weary officers were to "in the spirit of xmas" set prisoners free. Criteria? Answer a few questions.

The first prisoner to step forward was from Austria (one of the unfortunate ones). The following conversation took place:

Soldier: "Please answer zese kestion. In ze year 1912, an ice breeker sailed from sousampton on her vey to newfondlan but ze ship vos hit by an ice verg and it zank, vot vos its name?
Prisoner: "Its The Titanic! Sir!!"
Soldier: "Veghry Good, You are free to go" And the austrian prisoner went on his way happy.

The next prisoner to step forward was from America.
Soldier: "Please answer zese kestion. In ze year 1912, an ice breeker called ze Titanic, sailed from sousampton on her vey to newfondlan but ze ship vos hit by an ice verg and it zank, How many people ver on board ze ship?"

Prisoner: "About 1500 people were on board the ship sir!"
Soldier: "Veghry Good, You are free to go" And the amerian prisoner also went on his way happy.

The next prisoner to step forward was from Isael - A Jew.

Soldier: "Please answer zese kestion. In ze year 1912, an ice breeker called ze Titanic, sailed from sousampton on her vey to newfondlan but ze ship vos hit by an ice verg and it zank, About 1500 people ver on board ze ship. Vot vos ze names?"
Prisoner: "@&*^%@!!" ;)

[joshSCH]

hahaha..

[Aia]

You have to wonder about the human spirit. Willing to laugh even in and of bad circustances.
Take for example that joke. Combining two tragedies to make us laugh.

[christina>you]

"The Perfect Husband"

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker- function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen. MAN: "Hello"
WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"
MAN: "Yes."
WOMAN: "I'm at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?"
MAN: "Sure, go ahead if you like it that much."
WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2007 models. I saw one I really liked."
MAN: "How much?"
WOMAN: "$65,000."
MAN: "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."
WOMAN: "Great! Oh, and one more thing. The house we wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking $950,000."
MAN: "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer, but just offer $900,000."
WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later! I love you!"
MAN: "Bye, I love you, too."
The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are looking at him in astonishment.

Then he smiles and asks: "Anyone know whose phone this is?"

[Aia]

Christina that is a good wholesome joke, worth repeating. You made me laugh.

[joshSCH]

hahaha.. that would SUCK..

[christina>you]

Christina that is a good wholesome joke, worth repeating. You made me laugh.

Yesss, finally!
Actually it was on my iGoogle page with the top best jokes of the day and I thought I'd share it with you all.. ;)

[joshSCH]

dude, I totally just made iGoogle my homepage yesterday! lol.. google rocks.. they should merge with microsoft and exxon mobile.. then dominate the WORLD!:twisted:

[Aia]

dude, I totally just made iGoogle my homepage yesterday! lol.. google rocks.. they should merge with microsoft and exxon mobile.. then dominate the WORLD!:twisted:

You evildoer! You axis of evil! ;)

[joshSCH]

MUHAHAHAHA!:twisted: :icon_twisted: :icon_evil: :icon_exclaim:

[Aia]

I am just following the example that my country president gives me. Creating good, and meaningful
relationships, based in insults and provocation. ;)

[joshSCH]

Where exactly are you from?

[Aia]

Speaking from Utah, USA. But I'm not born in USA.

[joshSCH]

What's your native country? India? Pakistan?

[Aia]

Canary Islands, Spain.

[Duki]

Google will never partner with Microsoft... they are arch rivals. :D
(The Google Story- Great book)

Dear John,

I have been unable to sleep since I broke off our engagement.
Won't you forgive and forget? Your absence is breaking my heart.
I was a fool, nobody can take your place. I love you.

All my love,

Belinda. xxxxoooxxxx

P.S. Congratulations on winning this week's lottery.

[joshSCH]

Google will never partner with Microsoft... they are arch rivals. :D

haha.. you can always dream..

Dear John,

I have been unable to sleep since I broke off our engagement.
Won't you forgive and forget? Your absence is breaking my heart.
I was a fool, nobody can take your place. I love you.

All my love,

Belinda. xxxxoooxxxx

P.S. Congratulations on winning this week's lottery.

Did I miss something here.. :?:

[jbennet]

Google will never partner with Microsoft... they are arch rivals. :D
(The Google Story- Great book)

Hehe google + apple

[Aia]

Did I miss something here..

Yeah, the winning lottery ticket. I guess you are not the lucky one.

[joshSCH]

What do you mean? What lottery ticket?

[christina>you]

Lol... it was Duki's joke he got from the Google book.

The woman was "upset" about her breaking up with the man and told him she was stupid for doing it and then said "congratulations on winning the lottery."

[joshSCH]

haha.. oh.. totally missed that :(

[Aia]

haha.. oh.. totally missed that :(

Better late than never.

[hi-five]

Sorry this is terrible but i love it anyway:

Swimming is good for you...........espescially when your drowning

[jbennet]

hahah

[twomers]

Well. If I was drowning one thing I would like to do is be able to swim.

[christina>you]

Here's another joke of the day that I thought was pretty funny. :)

A thief stuck a pistol in a man's ribs and said, "Give me your money."

The gentleman, shocked by the sudden attack, said "You cannot do this, I'm a United States Congressman!"

The thief said, "In that case, give me my money!"

[joshSCH]

lol :D

[Aia]

Christina, my wife laughed with that one.

[christina>you]

Christina, my wife laughed with that one.

Hehe, that's awesome. :)