I'm just going to post something that i posted in another forum, as I already typed out what's going on in my life and do not want to type it out again.


i've been thinking about my life these last 4-5 years. originally started with wanting to do a music major. then i switched to trying to do pharmacy. Couldn't stand that so i went back to music. Applied for a university and wasn't accepted into the music program. Family kept telling me it wasn't meant to be. So i felt like since i liked computers i would do computer science.

I got accepted into a university and already have 1 year under my belt. But i realize that i hate programming. I'm basically on a deadline because my brother in law is a programmer, and he wants to take me into his job when i graduate, and i have to be an expert in the C programming language by next summer, along with being really good in the Unix terminal, by next summer, or they can't hire me. Basically everything i'm doing in school is Bull because it's all about this job my brother in law is setting me up with. The school doesn't teach C, and doesn't teach Unix.

I'm completely stressed because i have no desire to work on this shit. I dread it. I like computers, but not this kind of stuff. I think I quit to early and should have applied to other schools for music.

I'm already 1 year in (i transfer in from a community college) i am about $6000 in debt already from student loans, so it's not like i can just back out now. I think i've dug the hole too deep.

Maybe it would have been better for me to go to someplace like Devry, get a computer technician certification. And go to work asap, making enough to live ok on my own and put more of my focus on music on the side.

But no, i think it's too late. All i care about is getting any type of job so i can support my musical projects and live an ok life. I don't need to make 100+k a year for this. Looking at my brother in law, it looks like i am driving myself into a trap of a job that takes over my whole life, having to work even when i go home. Having no time for anything. I don't want that crap, if it's going to be like that, kill me now.

I'm not a very good programmer, I despise programming. All it does, is cause me stress. Is this what a computer science degree will lead me to? A job sitting in a cubicle all day programming? I feel behind compared to my peers because everyone seems to know a lot more about computers than I do. Basically i thought that since I spend most of my time on a computer anyways, and have messed around with different operating systems, that computer science is the right path, but now i'm not so sure. Is there anything in the field that does not require any programming?

Should i just finish this degree basically as a backup, try to find some basic job to help support myself, and try to dive deep into my true passion?

If you really despise programming you probably won't be employed long doing it. There are enough people out there that like programming that no employer will feel the need to keep you on.

It's never too late to change your major. I changed mine at the end of my 4th year in college, much to everyones surprise :)

Look for what interests you and do it. If you don't have the passion for programming, then opt out

It's time for you to pause and calmly sort things out a bit before jumping into something else. It seems that you have a passion for music and you don't necessarily have a clear passion for anything else. Just doing something to make money without having much real interest in it means that you'll be spending 40 hours a week wishing you were playing music or doing something else and you'll probably never be really good at it. I understand the attraction that music has because I played in bands over the years and liked that better than most other things that I did. I was never under any illusions about making a living from it (and you may not be either at this point) and I really did like programming so that gave me a path that worked out pretty well.

Most Universities have guidance departments and there might be some benefit to going through one or more of the standard aptitude tests to get an inventory of what you like and don't like. If, for example, you have a problem with "A job sitting in a cubicle all day" whether its programming or something else, then you might need something more active. That would put a lot of office jobs much lower on your list. You can probably get a book or find internet resources that would help you to do an assessment on your own.

There are certainly other computer-related jobs that don't involve programming (e.g. computer ops, network ops, help desk, QA testing) so there are other possibilities. If you do a self-assessment and decide that one of these other options might appeal to you (more than any other realistic possibilities) and that you seem to have the basic skills and personality that's needed, then your brother-in-law might be a good resource to help you. At a minimum, it sounds as if you need to get out of the program that you are currently in and tell your brother-in-law that it isn't going to happen the way he imagined it. If you have an interest in a particular type of role and he has the ability to let you see what it involves first-hand, that would be a big bonus in helping you to decide if that is for you or not. Depending on the company, some of these roles may not require much formal training if you're starting at the bottom (there may be a lot of in-house or on-the-job training instead).

If you come to the conclusion that music is the only thing that's going to do it for you, then you need to look at music-related jobs and see if any of those are realistic possibilities. Getting a University or College degree could be part of your plan but it doesn't necessarily have to be an up-front requirement. Maybe you need to try some stuff first and once you are clearer on your path, you could get back into a program on a full or part-time basis.

I wish you good luck. Let us know what happens.

There are certainly some jobs in the CS department that don't involve programming.

You know what they say, those who can't do, teach.

I certainly don't think you are alone in feeling the way you do. I was in the same boat as you. I chose Computer Science as my major. About halfway into it I found out that I couldn't stand it. I hated programming with a passion. I made the erroneous assumption that since I enjoyed computers that Computer Science was the right choice for me. I assumed that I would learn other aspects of computer science than just programming. Unfortunately that wasn't the case. Every single class involved programming. I was on a full-ride scholarship to college. Since it was too late to switch majors and get done within 4 years (that's how long my scholarship was for), I decided to just finish it out and get the degree. I am a very intelligent person...graduated valedictorian of my high school class and graduated with honors in college. I took a job right out of school doing programming and I absolutely despised it. I gave it three months...3 months of dreading going to work everyday. It got to the point that it was affecting my mental well being. It got to the point where I was thinking that if i have to do this for another 45 years, I just wanted to die. At that point I said enough is enough. I quit and took a job where I wasn't miserable that had nothing to do with computers. It doesn't pay much over minimum wage, but at least I have my mental sanity and don't have to be stressed or take work home with me. I too have been looking for a job with computers that doesn't involve programming but have not been successful. The fact of the matter is that computer programming is miserable work unless you have a deep passion for it. Even if you have a passion for it, it is stressful work. I myself would rather be happy and not have much money than to be miserable and stressed with money.

I am a very intelligent person...

Apparently not as intelligent as you think you are.